Gregory Snake and the Halitosis Pit

Now I was just slithering about my home in the woods one day when I saw a big pair of stompin boots comin my way.

"Run!" I told my babies. They turned and wandered off just as them big boots stopped in front of me. Now I'm a Texas rattle and back home when some man stands and faces you it means only one thing; duel.

"Yippy ty ay!" I thought, "Me and this man, we're gonna have fun together".

I saw his hand looming closer. I reared and shook my tail in the customary acceptance style, "let's dance Bub", I thought. He grabbed me around the neck, not what I call a fair start, but I was in "the mood" and nothing stops a rattler in "the mood". I struck! I jabbed a nice deep snap in his neck. "How do you like having points in your neck?"

I guess he though that was real unsportsmanlike cuz then he brought me face level. "Had enough?" I shouted, and you know what he did? He opened his mouth and shoved me in. Talk about unfair!

I wasn't gonna stand for that so I bit him right on that non-forked tongue of his. I guess he didn't like that because next thing I knew I was out of that hole and breathing fresh air again. "Hey," I shouted, "I don't need no whiplash now ya hear!"

He was mad now. He brought me closer to his menacing lips.

"Un-uh! I'm not going back in that halitosis pit!" I bit him in the neck again. He screeched.

"Serves you right!" Bite!

"Sticking me in your mouth!" Bite!

"Your teeth must have never seen a Tic Tac man!" Bite!

"You want to take a trip in my mouth?" Bite!

Now the breath insults must have really hit home because he sent me back in his damp yapper and chomped. He was loosing his mind! And I was loosing my head. And that was it. The next thing I knew my body was limp in his hand and my head was laying on the grass covered in drool.

2004 Young Writers' Camp