Darkness

The darkness comes and goes. One moment I am contemplating a single thought then the black casts its spell. It blows in through the gaping window in my mind. The fog covers the floor overtaking the lame sights that mean nothing now. The darkness gets darker, at first it is silent. Silent as though something is waiting. Silent like the stale attic that lies at the top of the house. The house where this all began.

Flapping wings swirl around my head, circling as though I were their prey. The soft melodious hum of the single continuous song floods through the window pushing the curtains aside. The knighted gales follow, their voices sound as small as their bodies at first. Voices tower over me as I lay limp in the center of the room that is my mind. All windows, no doors, never a place to run to, only a place to remind me of what will never be tangible.

The moon raises high in the sky in one window as two shadows walk silently along the darkened street. Their happiness glows around them illuminating a welcoming, pleasant feeling. My heart ached at the memory of what once was. Before all of this happened I had once been one of those shadows.

In the window beside it the sun was setting across the horizon. The sky looked as though an artist paints had spilled across the horizon. Splotches of color adorn the blue sky as it grew darker and darker until it met the deep purple. Pink, red, orange and yellow splashed on the deep purple shore. Beside the setting sun sat another frame, this one held a young girl on a swing set. Her legs pumping slowly as the swing rose higher and higher. With each swift movement of her tiny feet she came closer and closer to the sky. Her head flung back and she smiled to no one in particular. She was flying, she was free she was happy. To her right the bright blue sky morphed to black. Like a deadly plague it took over the sky. Eating it slowly, inch by inch the sky became ink and there was only the darkness.

The bird's song returned, repeating over and over in the confinement of my head. Leisurely the moments passed as I divulged into nothingness. The nothingness devoured me, encircling me. Binding my pale hands together, lashing my wrists closer and closer. I open my mouth to scream but I hear no sound. I feel strained, as though I am in my coffin. I am buried feet beneath the surface. I am nothing but a memory from a photograph or a dreaded thought. They amble above and over me. I hear their foot steps echo. I am the epitome of loneliness, I feel void. I am so distant, so alone. The chant returns followed by the knighted gales floating on their melodious wind. They grow closer as they whisper in my ear, becoming quieter and quieter.

Abruptly a stingy pain laces through out my body, buzzing loudly in my head. Reverberating constantly making me quiver. I perceive the sunlight hit my eyelids, inflaming them. Rays from the sun illuminate my ashen face. I discern the gleam but my eyes are still shut and for a moment I believe that I am truly dead. I am ready to descend amongst the darkened shadows man never sees.

Once again alone and free. I lie there, wherever there is for with each awakening I am lost. I hear the patter of their feet hitting the ground as they run toward me. In their fear they shake me, desperate for a sign that I am alive and still breathing. I am jostled side to side, their hands making me sway. I rock for a while moving with them as though we are on a boat and then my eye lids shot open.

Before me lies the sun peaked in the sky, shrouded in its blatant existence. It elucidates the darkness I try to escape to. The sun watches and laughs, spitting fire at my eyes. This is hell. I have been cursed, destined to be set apart. Feared by normality and its followers. In the see of followers I am a light. An aura glowing brighter than all others. I suppose that is what attracted them to me. There were not always knighted gales in my head. I did not ask to be chosen, nor did I ask to be possessed. This life is hopeless, well what is left of it anyway. Confusion clouds my thoughts while fear obtains what is left of my broken heart. Life is empty, I have lost everything. My family has disowned me, my house has been seized. My life lies in shambles. Each a piece of the broken glass in front of me. I remember the times when life was filled with simple pleasures and people to love. Now it is a barren night without stars. Where the widowed moon sits silently in dejection.